Thursday, September 22, 2005
the next entry mite be a long long time later.
you know i wont run away. i will always stay till the end. its jus me. though i said something else but in my heart it means another. trust me, think of me whenever u need someone, coz i will definitely be the first to be there. without a doubt.
I'm perplexed by the queer things that happened yday. even now, i'm still baffled at what has been going on,and what has happened. is it wrong or right? i guess it's wrong because we're supposed to be moving on.
I try to push away the constant thoughts, the wanting, the need, the love, replace it with numb calmness and dead oblivion. i'm succeeding. :) halt to the king! we're not pathetic, we're not miserable. and it's okay that we're going un-noticed and forgotten. at least, we're following our hearts in what ever matters concerned. hohoho how true. :)
[[In the years to come.
Will you think about these moments that we shared.
In the years to come.
Are you gonna think it over?
Nothing lasts forever though we want it to.
The road ahead holds different dreams for me and you.
Sometimes goodbye, though it hurts in your heart
Is the only way for destiny
Sometimes goodbye, though it hurts
Is the only way now for you and me
Though its the hardest thing to say
I miss you in every way.
In a year from now
Maybe there'll be things we'll wish we never said
In a year from now
Maybe we'll see each other
Standing on the same street corner, no regrets
Each and every end is always written in the stars.
If only I could stop the world, I'd make this last.
And when you need my arms to run into
I'll come for you
Nothing will ever change the way I feel.
Because a true love never dies. ]]
i guess its all summarize here. u play a major part in my life, u still do n u always will.
i wish i nv wake up today. the moment i do, part of me seems to be missing n OUCH. fuji apple save the day with a few cherries n strawberries accompany! :)
realized i've nv tell u something. maybe one day u'll know wad's that.
[[464779686295363]] till den.
my blood dried @ 4:33 PM
Thursday, September 15, 2005
i have absolutely no idea wad m i feeling.
maybe i'm too afraid to accept wad happened to the extend that i fear getting anywhere close to that.
the emotions are stirring.
y do i feel like i'm reliving those nightmares.
i will do anything not to feel that way.
n i mean anything.
i saw the state of my heart in future.
not here nor there.
juz, gone.
gone with the wind.
questions have been ringing in my head.
i m not perfect.
i m not saint.
i m no angel
but its the love n faith that keep me going.
i guess it should be time to let the head rule over the mind.
i hafta grow up.
simply, i'm afraid.
should i stay, should i go?
till then.
my blood dried @ 2:37 PM
Monday, September 12, 2005
let me see.
highlight of the week. SORE EYES. SHIT!
n i seriously mean SHIT! lol.
forget it. wad's done cannot be undone. -bite my mother-
alright. i cant go back to where i used to be. it wont do me or pple ard me any good.
trust me when i say i'm not a nice person.
dun push it idiots!
:)
had a phone call. omg. a phone call that i've waited for 4 yrs for. a phone call that i nv thot will ever come. haha. 6 hrs of chatting n we can chat even more. but due to her stupid FIANCE! she gonna go. f**k that ass**le! lol. hey, i know u read this, so ya, sometimes doing things on impulse will only make u bruise ultimately. think properly alright? need any help feel free to come to me. :) yes i'm an angel! hahaha. n ya wad u said make sense. i will think about it. its hard for me to stand up agn. one time is enuff to kill. u know it. but i will give it a try. n, we'll be colleagues one day. that day will come. :)
read some articles somewhere. dunno y the protective gear programmed itself to start working again.
i swear i have very STRONG gut feelings. promise me. dun hide anything from me.
n ya, maybe all memories should be gone from my brain. coz someone said. since memories cant be relived again then y bother to keep it. how true.
nothing to say. dun feel like saying.
till then.
my blood dried @ 2:24 PM
Friday, September 09, 2005
i finally found the answer. thanks.
it took me 3 freaking long years to find that out.
it feels like an egg broke, and all the contents inside juz came rushing out. get wad i mean? everything juz seems to make sense. al least for now. it feel so.. good.
did i juz mention that i had itchy eyes?!
n thanks for letting me know the ans. :)
till then.
my blood dried @ 11:49 PM
Saturday, September 03, 2005
oh dun u juz love teachers' day?! haha.
u'll know secrets about ur teachers that u nv imagine u'll know when u're in that school!
now u're out, u feel like u're part of the big big AUTHORITY circle. when they'll let u in with teeny weeny
GOSSIPS!! lol.
like who is dating who.
who's gf/bf look like jon J/pamela andersen, or looked too sorry to even describe. LOL.!
fill me with more! :D
i did some studying today. cant say i'm totally productive. but hey! i study din i?! :D
i concluded that i have very very short attention span.
a few hrs in woodlands n awhile in cck. den that's it. i cant take it anymore. haha. suppsoed to go to east coast for bbq. i'm surprised she actually asked me to go. n she say she'll pei me! ahha. -look at knee-
i tink i beta dun. :)
ENJOY URSELF!!! -waves-
i feel like an angel today! -beams-
how nice it is to feel angelic.
come everyone! special request?
name it n u shall get it.
area only range from woodlands to jurong, or woodlands to sengkang.
price: depend on my mood. lol.
she woke up in the morning, only to feel this lostness. thinking about wad's gonna happened or wad is happening she realized she missed someone more than she's supposed to. suddenly lose faith in wadeva she believe, she decided to live that day like a living zombie. maybe she is destined to be lidat. only able to see pple around her happy, yet she herself feeling like a fool, someone who dun deserve anything. she is used to it. she teared.
i can feel IT coming. shit! lol.
till den.
my blood dried @ 11:11 PM
Thursday, September 01, 2005
i can never haf the life that i wish i have.
u like my life? take it. i'm sick of it.
dun haunt me. i'm fragile.
max.
revive.
please.
till den.
my blood dried @ 3:20 PM